avocado p'nut butter cinnamon burritos for b'fast. bought wraps yesterday $tore.
i was at gym 6:30. i love it so much.
i dreamed all my sadness lifetime stored in abdomen stomach.
i'm charging city samsung and my sunnyvale dell and listening to 2 count 'em 2 healing.
AWESOME!! i'm hanging out seniors. i'm planning options for holiday week.
i'm so proud of me. i called star one booked for wed 10 ira.
all i wanted from life was peace. autism focuses on the important. happy healthy wealthy wise. happiness is constantly evolving just as we're growing and changing. that's why i don't like setting goals. they evolve and change. hopefully we evolve and change.
i'm getting calmer. i felt so relaxed i drove off after picking up fallen fruit. i left half the recycle and lunch bag on front porch. after gym dollar tree no seam ripper. at danny's i couldn't figure where the big bag of plastic was. i looked all over car. came home straight from lunch. i need more rest to balance relaxation.
woke 4 am game shows b'fast. cost co gas 6:30 gym. $tore forgot to check seam ripper only car copy left. picked up healthy snacks.
he lived my life as an actual male. i asked his dad Frank the day after he died ( i didn't believe he was dead so i thought connected and he was dead) why when he was about to retire he said he didn't want to travel was done arguing had lived through WW 2 survived his 442 experience and sacrificed himself for Eric who always felt survivor's guilt.
i've carried so much sadness. toke dropped off nijiya market kimpira. supposed to be healthy full of msg.
i feel like i've been awake forever. i let chrome run down to 8% and shut down. i restarted and charging. format is weird.
i'm sewing and going through bags since 2018 when eric's new used car purchase. lots i haven't missed or needed.
i've been smelling salonpas menthol vicks odor. since yesterday i thought it was the wash but it travels i can't locate it. my back is good. all the shoulder work hanging and folding the clothes i'm good.
i tried sardines. 2 people i know love them i don't. tastes metallic. worth the try i'll feed the rest to crows. cooked chick thigh to go with spaghetti.
i loaded 3 is same price as 2 load machine. i like the front load washers easy on back and 2 entrances and lots of parking. life is so easy following spirit.
lunch ok. home hung laundry. rested back loving copper fit back brace.
teaches mental discipline. bill got so upset i read the book. like thousands of other people. don't know why or how it showed up on you tube suggestions.
as bugs bunny would say what a maroon.
i've disappointed myself not accepting people as they are. i've done it to myself. i listened to what they said not looked at what they did.
8:17 nothing on tv time for bed. myrtle fillmore scheduled rest and reflection as an important part of her day. if i don't have what i want i need to make changes.
in every way on every level. adds nothing destroys everything.
how can civilized people allow it?
watched 'any day now'. busy living.
i watched annie oakley on tv ate sushi toke brought me last night. i'm exhausted. i have 5 new city movies. so violent.
watching 'malcolm in the middle' makes me sad to think that chaos is the real family dynamic.
i'm listening to healing. wouldn't be able to live otherwise. used god energy directing me to pick up fruit, spray car windows, put out cheese for crows. so lovely cool 7:30.
i decided to watch 9 am David Janssen 'harry o' marathon. watched my 'any day now'. went to st just pantry no waiting. 9 eggs one cracked, chicken quarters etc. i'm feeling blessed. with god energy no effort.
picked up freebie $4.49 o s cranberry watermelon 100% juice. i forgot my suit so showered leisurely.
trunk a mess organized fruit, laundry. seniors 8:30. waiting on spirit. puzzled, then stepped watching my show. shared with Trudy how mom dad ex stuck in past. today's daily word forgive. i release the past move forward.
feeling sad. came home to note on door re yard fire hazard like i'd choose to live like this. just like my sabotaging sisters causing trouble. mom died of broken heart from lies. while dad alive in hospital both sis assured mom she had homes with them. i knew different and suggested house trade not sale. neither wanted her and made excuses. so she died here. i tried to keep house for sister mom wanted to have but they're afraid mom died here. and if not for my back i would have been gone from them forever. i bless and send them love.
feeling motivated i called Michael @ Walmart ordered supplements and Ray wanted back brace. no light weight equate i ordered copper fit twice price. we'll see i may like it. delivered by tomorrow in stock at store.
i considered going to sunny to return movies and the Big 5 store and target sunflower seeds but i didn't watching 77 sunset strip and Rockford files, Hawaii 5 0 instead. toke came by with sushi 6:30.
i'm feeling my feelings. processing letting go. addiction avoidance so much easier.
stayed up checked emails 9:12 Walmart delivered 4 of 6 items at 9 pm. i'm amazed.
they know me and wave me through. i feel like a celebrity. hot tub ya! soaked massaged my feet and calves 20 minutes. pool 80 o cold took 5 minutes to adapt paddled alone 10 minutes. 3 degrees makes a big difference.
dollar tree looked for eggs none. aquafaba. cornbread mix, almond milk, 4 dvd. after lunch bought frozen patty 4 dinners. to go into tortillas.
5 new bookmobile movies. Cody reminds me i get so distracted. lunch just Alex and me i went back to dollar tree for frozen 4 dinners 2 patties.
realized i haven't seen statement due 3 days researched online and paid phone.
my mid back is healing. so sore after nu stepping. why when i'm using my legs and arms i don't know. but sharp twisty pain.
called city talked to girl sidney. nothing. strange energy. salt and pepper on table and heather talked about me moving my charging. so weird. swam no tub yet. watched 'any day now' nu stepped my hour. i'm so good. i'm proud of myself.
toke always asks my plans. don't have any. energy is so weird.
talking to Sue seniors she brags she voted for Trump and believes all his lies refusing to admit he's a liar becoming furious won't admit mistake. doesn't believe people have died for his lies. that the news is fake. i wonder if he's apocalypse satan. white american women are Trumps power base. women hating they're women. Trump objectifies and subjugates everyone men women children. he uses fear to control and manipulate.
consolidating my gains. the distractions force focus commitment. strengthening my resolve. right now i'm freshly rested.
uh oh i forgot to pay city fry day. oh, well. won't be forever. i wonder if i'm low vitamin d? can cause depression. besides slow healing.
new behavior. i keep forgetting how exhausting constant pain is. lovely sabbath. don't have to go anywhere do anything. eating chicken swiss cheese lettuce croissant. i'm blessed.
i'm exercising my thinking playing mahjongg. keeping my thinking flexible.
i haven't had this good a day in i can't remember how long. beautiful super moon. lucky's free soda, 2 lbs delicious cherries. i took my time gym 3 forgot my suit went back to car, passed me through. usually make me re register. home 9:15 forgotten i left house open. still deliciously cool day. 10 am 'any day now' croissant sandwich creamy italian dressing braised chicken with green salad.
i feel it. i went gym 3 soaked stretched. Lucky's freebie didn't show 'til after lunch and not in e mails. i kept checking account to add. showed up 7:30 pm. they open 6 am.
lunch pretty good. gave toke more avocados for niece visiting. she left me cost co croissants. went $tore too busy hot came home. must remember to wait after lunch rush.
watching what i want. tailored repairs. listening to healing. ate split pea soup and croissant. defrosting chicken.
parking in front i forgot suit so just showered. picked up recycles and abandoned cap joshua from seniors 3 years ago parked across from me started talking to me. he's rehabbing his back hit by car riding bike. looked good must have needed the rest. he used to fly down to l. a. to consult on films.
cody brought the chrome combo and offered to let me keep both. i checked out my new favorite samsung needed charge works even better than lenovo. i gave him avocados and fruit. turned in extra book and put away sv hot spot. i'll take it back later. .
yesterday library rather traumatic. feeling ganged up on double teamed 2 white boys against asian woman. not the money the approach rankles. i may go for tutor today. every wednesday 2-3.
today gym 7 seniors 8:15. best #1 parking spot. waited half hour to give genie avocados. i just remembered i still have some manju she gave me in fridge. changed her spelling.
watched my 5 am game shows. life improving. in my opinion.
i guess i didn't update. the crack must have been there i wouldn't have noticed and why it doesn't hold settings. roff and jeff tech experts must have known and double teamed me. refurbished tags. so not even new.
good day toke and me at lunch. i told her how diane moved my things over yesterday to sit next to me. she was surprised too so it wasn't just me being paranoid.
blessed the money and moved on.
took my time. had to too sore and stiff could barely walk back brace immediately. too much cookie coma. i soaked stretched. senior i decided to nu step and changed tv channel 170 watched any day now 1 hour. hope i can walk tomorrow.
Diane early after swim class. tried to mislead me about being early for some reason. trying to ingratiate herself maybe toke mentioned avocados to her. that sneaky element showing itself. shifty eyes. sat next to me superseding toke. presumptuous. insidious. late comer Alice pretending to be nice.
fell over bag of books home. more tired than i'm aware. ouch! got my attention. i'm evolving. brighter.
SIGH!
voicemail from sunnyvale broken screen chrome book no idea how sisters? i'll go tomorrow to pay. cheap considering how many years i've used for free. the convenience the knowledge expertise.
energy vampires.
i don't want to sleep. that's from hour nu step.
through technology we all can live all lives.
i cooked 2 chicken thighs then cup of quinoa in juices. my back all around waist legs thighs hurt nausea.
watching 'pee wee herman big adventure' to distract myself. pain is making me angry. soaked gym and felt slightly better. drove through detour to sunnyvale.
how perfect-i returned combo and hot spot ready. sitting in traffic remembered and paid citibank.
i'm looking up aquafaba.
i'm figuring things out. toke commented on my imagination yesterday at lunch. i don't imagine i describe what i see. i can't project what i can't see. i can only describe what i see in dimensions.
today i learned not to add powdered drink to seltzer or it volcanoes like a horribly messy science experiment.
the goop in chickpeas. cornbread and beans b'fast sets protein absorption for day.
loaded and picked up freebie energy drink. we'll see. and Lucky double point weekend.
so heavenly doing what i want when i want. my biggest resistance to doctor's scheduling.
i woke with gum in my hair. easily combed it out with castor oil. pool chlorine is turning my white hair greenish. i like it. i'm amazed all the times i've fallen asleep chewing gum this is the first. chewing is self soothing hence the popularity of gum.
swam half hour then stretched and soaked.
i got half portion lunch. oh, well. i could barely taste the onions in cucumber salad but juice powerful effect.
fell asleep napped half hour watching 'concentration'.
froze then crashed. i think the battery is old. makes me glad i borrow and don't own. or i'd feel i wasted my money.
realized i don't have to do big production. took what i already had in car. they wouldn't take glass bottles. came home early only salads today put glass in recycle bin. rewarded myself fresh strawberries and cheese cake.
i pruned kiwi attached to house and ivy growing into bathroom window screen. and i had to forcibly stop myself doing more. i'm feeling sad and alone. doing keeps me from feeling. workaholics.
7 am gym swim soak. dollar tree potted meat cracker snack 9 am hungry. front store walk cleaned up trash and recycle. found beautiful blue marble. i'm finding my marbles.
format keeps resetting to normal. just another anomaly. i'm getting used to miracles. healing music won't play unless i listen. keeps stopping. that you tube.
tabs are disappearing. wonder where they go.
home rested then cooked best eggs medium, last box cornbread in toaster oven for beans, defrosted 2 chick drums for teriyaki. prepped second lb strawberries for nob hill cheesecake sampler. i'm so blessed.
i can't hold a grudge distracted by anything fun. mom saw it as a flaw. she could hold a grudge into the infinite. i saw it as a waste of my time and energy.
7 am filled gas $5.099. gym an hour soaking swimming. feeling great went to chase then cu banking done. i'm amazing. wrote it all out sitting at chase 8:50 it disappeared.
lunch was lovely. sprinkled so i washed car windows.
CRASH!! i wonder if the disappeared will someday reappear.
