anniversary of death 25 years ago-Hark

bedridden since may 13 I woke up minutes before the second jet hit.  I turned on the TV and changed channels watching the same feed of a burning skyscraper.  17 minutes later waves of shock and confusion glad my mom died not witnessing the horror.  

I can't watch those enjoying the attention.  

I was too focused on my sisters threats of violence and eviction.  

lunch was OK Fred, Toki, happy Walter.  2 extra chicken, dulces.  Toki got another jury duty notice.  10 days to respond.  maybe Monday seniors computer.  or Mission library.  Oh, I could go to her house too.  

Fred's b'day 18th then vacation 2 weeks.  

Hark I can listen just for me and fulfill improving the planet containing me.

blessed-$5.50/gal sunny +dime

I plugged the chrome in crooked didn't charge 46%.  

I remembered to get gas Coleman.  went up from b-4 holiday.  

just me and Walter today.  Sunshine and Ruben and Walter gave me desserts.  I got extra lunch.  At noon 90 degrees Walter left early.  101 degrees in the shade at seniors lunch.  95 driving, 82 parking garage.  

library volunteer old white female heard my Louise hates heaven.  explains the world.  rather serve in hell to keep others from entering heaven.  

feeling sad -I'm #1

Louise is my consolation.  looking for Real Foods corn thins sesame.  

24 hour at 9 am #1 space.  finished 9:30 on to B King 2 jr and 2 med fries coupon.  

people litter due to feeling frustrated.  I sat through 2 cycles waiting to turn left on Olive.  

Sunny #1 all day shade at 10:08 am.  last shade.  I considered sewing lab but nah, I don't feel like working.

5:40 finished 750 pc sewing 7 cats puzzle.  

continuous vitamin C and allergy plant-PAID CITIBANK

tylophora indica.  I'm feeling much better.

I went to 24 at 10 am then Citibank.  maybe gasoline tomorrow.  

seniors and central today.  keeping my appointments.  lunch banh mi not as good roll no gravy.  I got extra and I gave lackluster coleslaw to Walter.  

I drove to back parking gave Toki all the fruit.  no seniors this week.  

Martha security asked permission for me to use the staff elevator since central broken.  and she looks like she lost 10-15 lbs.  I bought Beatles Revolver for $2.  

wheel- fuji apple-CORRECT

Labor Day summer cold-Toki left me Arare Mix

Saturday I stood outside talking to Melvin in the wind and the fuzzy pollen has locked my sinuses.  my forehead is on fire.  

I'm blessed to rest.  so good.  

still feeling sad-healing the past

I ate candy to cheer myself so I'm stuffy.  post nasal drip.  my drug of choice sweets and chips.  1 bag.

watching Biography-Cat Stevens, Dolly Parton.  

I made mac and cheese comfort food.  tuna avocado on toast.  I'm taking care of myself.  

maybe 30 years (Happy death day dad)-Melvin chips

to get over the trauma and drama.  it's been 27.  dad's last month my sisters tortured mom, dad and I.  they suddenly took an interest in goading us.  mom going to Tahoe leaving me with dad then the chiropractor appointments leaving him tortured in pain mom and I had to experience helplessly for a week.  finally killed him in Kaiser.   

then their broken promises to mom to take care of her.  she died of a broken heart not heart failure.  no wonder I still sad.  they tried to evict me for 8 years.  harassing me 'til I retained an attorney.  complaining I was costing them money.   

listening to 432 Hz Alpha waves.  quite nice.  you tube just wanders.  and I wonder.  it's working.  

3 pm Melvin brought me 2 bags of low salt Safeway chips.  MIRACLE.  I shared my dad's last month alive.  

I'm no longer alone.