without incident. the way I like. I'm still watching "Wings". I guess most people have calm simple lives. I can't fathom that.
I decided at noon to return hot spot. Sunny has 61 to city 37. some of which aren't active. some are years overdue some months. arrived half hour early #1 parking in sun. only supposed to rise to 81 degrees.
how excellent.
no stress. I woke and ate crust less sandwich with a slice of tomato. ready for the day I watched Wings TV trying to figure out its popularity. I don't get it.
8 am I remembered I needed gasoline. I checked the prices and dressed. the tanker was there. it frequently is. I drove in drove out on to 24. I showered lovely cool overcast from wildfire pollution.
I mailed my life insurance and picked up St Just. saw Gloria said hi. new puzzle of cats interesting oddly shaped 500 piece finished 3 pm. people love dumping their kids.
caught my eye at the library. made me realize I wasn't a person to my family. I was their property. so no respect or consideration. and they still treat me like a thing not a feeling person.
Walter is a person with a toothache ignoring the pain hoping it goes away. he doesn't like dealing with it. it doesn't go away on its own. it demands attention.
9:30 4th to last lunch. wow, meatloaf must be popular. the music is from the 1930s and 40s. classic universal language. 50s and 60s is more the age group. a lot of Asians have their kids taking care of them.
had a lovely cool shower at 24. I considered visiting Food Max, later. I could go to St Just.
10:35 half the room cleared. beef meatloaf generous portion.
I left for Sprouts but nothing. took Wolfe to ECR to Flora to Kiely. St Just 11:30. 4 very ripe bananas good dessert. finished puzzle 2:30.
5:30 pm I'm feeling unreasonably angry today dad's death day. OK I'm angry Mitzi crying to me she killed him when I told her to leave him be. such a family of hypocrites. so I'm movin' and groovin' like mom. the only time she cleaned when she got mad.
he keeps doing the same living in the past referring to long ago as if it happened lately. stuck. he misses the center and refuses to try the mission library. he thinks I don't like him. I told him again I know he deserves better. he doesn't believe it.
I like the freedom. I woke 8 am and I like it. I showered, withdrew Chase teller, deposit Merriwest, shopped Sprouts 2 goat cheese 2/$5, 3 CBD drinks $3 ea.
lovely lunch Fred and Walter. library and home.
1:12 pm I finished the Lego puzzle. the boys failed yesterday. and the desk librarian is putting it away and setting out a new one.
I showered at 24 and went to Walmart and paid PGE bought some chips $1.50 taste test low salt crispy. then I walked Prune Lucky's picked up senior lunch and St Just. new me. Fred had 2 heirloom cantaloupes I gave one to Bonny/Judy. smelled ripe just fell off the vine this morning. I asked if green or orange. I can eat green. I thought of Toke too late.
I'm processing 26 years of pain. as it leaves my body I feel lighter. I've been sleeping and waking as I did the last month of dad's life. I took on his pain. this last week is intense. feeling it doesn't get easier only more understandable.
I watched Rob Schneider 'The Chosen One' six times before my denial allowed me to see the alcohol suicide connection. I found the movie by accident. the 2010 film doesn't fit any category with its global warming warning. and here we are 2025 burning up the planet, still setting off massive fireworks, ignoring Putin's genocide in Ukraine polluting and further killing the planet. Hitler killed what he couldn't control too.
