every addict and i suspect criminal is seeking the absence of pain. choosing to feel self inflicted pain in an attempt to rid themselves of childhood pain.
i'm only feeling because i stopped running from it. i'm sitting with my pain feeling and processing. emotional wounds can be forever. the mechanism to help us avoid future pain can keep us prisoners of our past.
i work so hard. no wonder i'm exhausted. i force myself to stop and face the past when running is so much easier and natural. fight or flight. fighting the past is counter intuitive. seems nothing there. the past is the foundation for today.
i started for gym and detoured to Danny's recycle. $1.88 in trunk. i consider it practice. seniors i sat in car and phone paid Allstate home ins.
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