i need more naps

I COULD TAKE MORE NAPS.  I NEED MORE CARE.

I'M STILL LEARNING HOW TO DO THAT.  I NEVER NEEDED OR GOT THAT FROM ANYONE.  THE BARE MINIMUM TO STAY ALIVE.  HOW MY FAMILY TREATED ME AND I LEARNED TO TREAT MYSELF.  MORE THAN THE MINIMUM MAKES ME FEEL GUILTY.

SHOWER ME WITH GOOD.

I FINALLY TOLD INGA AND GERDA I'D DO FOR THEM BUT NOT NEVER GRATEFUL ROSE.  THE GERDA TELLS ME HOW ROSE TOOK ADVANTAGE OF HER AND STILL GERDA IS BENDING OVER BACKWARDS.  PUTTING UP WITH IT IS SELF ABUSE.  IT'S NOT ALRIGHT.

AFTER MOM WAS ABUSED AND NEGLECTED BY MY SISTERS ON HER LAST MOTHER'S DAY I STOPPED DOING WHAT THEY WANTED.  THEY COULDN'T TORTURE MOM ANYMORE.  AND I COULD IGNORE THEIR INSANE DEMANDS.

IT STILL HURTS ME THOUGH.