DISAPPEARED

IT VANISHED WHEN I PUBLISHED.  I THOUGHT IT WAS POSSIBLE TO VIEW DRAFT ONLINE BUT I GUESS NOT.

I JUST FOUND OUT THE BACK ARROW TAKES ME TO OLDER POSTS.  EVERYTHING I WROTE TODAY DISAPPEARED WHEN I PUBLISHED SO I GUESS IT'S GONE FOREVER.

MY ZOMBIE SISTERS SEALED THEIR FATE WHEN THEY IGNORED AND TORTURED MOM AND DAD AND ME.  THEIR BIOLOGY HAS BEEN DETERMINED BY THEIR CHOICES.  THEIR IRREVOCABLE GENETIC CONNECTION HAS BEEN PROGRAMMED BY THEIR BEHAVIOR.  MOM AND DAD CHOSE NOT TO CHANGE THEIR BEHAVIOR AND IT WAS LIKE WATCHING A SLOW TRAIN WRECK.  WHEN THEY ASKED ME TO HELP THEM I FELT IT WAS MY LIFE PURPOSE TO SHOW THEM A DIFFERENT LIFE FULL OF CHOICES.

YES, IT'S DIFFICULT.  YES, IT'S MORE WORK.  AND MORE REWARDS.

BECAUSE OF THE GENETIC CONNECTION THEY CAN'T TREAT US THAT WAY AND WALK AWAY.  IT'S LOCKED IN THEIR DNA.  'JUDGE NOT LEST YE BE JUDGED'  YOU CONDEMN YOURSELF BY YOUR JUDGMENTS.  CRUELTY TO OTHERS TELLS THE BODY THE DESIRED CHOICES.  PREDETERMINES THE OUTCOME.  TALK ABOUT BAGGAGE.

NOTHING I CAN DO FOR MY SISTERS DUE TO THEIR CHOICES SO I MUST SAVE MYSELF AND LOOK AWAY.  I MUST REMEMBER I'M UNABLE TO HELP THEM.  I CAN'T LET THEM PULL ME DOWN WITH THEM.  I CAN'T FOOL MYSELF INTO THINKING I CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE TO THOSE WHO DON'T WANT HELP.

I REMEMBERED I WROTE HEAVEN IS IN ALL DIRECTIONS.  MY NAME 'GIRL CHILD REACHING HEAVEN' I'VE LIMITED MYSELF TO UP WHEN HEAVEN IS ALL AROUND.  HEAVEN IS THE UNIVERSE.  THAT'S THE PIECE I'VE LACKED.  THAT'S BEEN MY LIMITATION.