feeling small

I'M TAKING KAVA IN AN ATTEMPT TO LIGHTEN MY MOOD.  DID SO MUCH YESTERDAY SEWING, BREWING COFFEE, ORGANIZING.  RUNNING FROM MY THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS.  AND IT WORKS TO A POINT.

I WORE MY BRACE AND WAS ABLE TO SLEEP A LITTLE.  ENOUGH TO REMEMBER I NEED TO GET GAS TODAY.  I FINALLY FIGURED THAT ONE OUT.  KEEPING THE MUSCLES AND NERVES ALIGNED IS THE TRICK.

I ATE BURGER FOR BREAKFAST.  I LIKE THE PROTEIN. 

I CAN FEEL MY BACK COMPRESSING WITHOUT THE BRACE.  THE GOOD PART IS I CAN FEEL IT, THE BAD IT'S SO WEAK.  AND NO NAUSEA.  HURRAH!

I BOUGHT MORE COFFEE FILTERS.  I CAN'T FIND WHAT I HAD.  I ALWAYS PUT THEM SOMEWHERE LOGICAL.  OF COURSE THE STEP SISTERS MAY HAVE STOLEN THEM.  I CAN USE THE FILTERS IN MASKS.  I BOUGHT THE MASKS BECAUSE OF MY ALLERGIES NEVER THINKING OF COFFEE FILTERS.

SO, 10 AM 3RD IN LINE.  AND NO INTERNET RECEPTION.  WHAT A DIFFERENCE 500 YARDS MAKE.  LIKE HAND GRENADES AND HORSE SHOES.

NEWS HAD DAYTONA CAR RACE COVERAGE AND I WAS STRUCK WITH THE WASTE OF RESOURCES.  SUCH A TREMENDOUS WASTE OF TIME.  MANKIND'S IMMATURITY.  LIKE SPORTS.  BASHING AND BEATING EACH OTHER FOR BRAGGING RIGHTS.  HOW ABOUT COMPETING IN HOME BUILDING AND RAISING FOOD.  SOMETHING USEFUL AND TRULY IMPORTANT.  MAKES ME GLAD I WON'T LIVE FOREVER AND SAD FOR THE KIDS.  WHAT A WORLD.  WHAT A MESS.  WE ONLY HAD TO WORRY ABOUT NUCLEAR WAR. 

LUNCH HAD CORN REMINDED ME HALF COB TO FINISH. 

NEWS STORIES OF DETERIORATING MENTAL HEALTH.  SUPPOSEDLY VIOLENT CRIMES, ABUSE UP.  I CONTEND JUST MORE APPARENT.  WHAT'S BEEN HIDDEN IS NOW OUT IN THE LIGHT.