OMG

I'VE NEVER FELT SUCH EMOTIONAL PAIN.  I NUMBED OUT ALL MY LIFE.  FIRST I WAS WAS TAUGHT SUPPRESSION FROM MY ABUSIVE MOTHER AND LEARNED TO USE TOBACCO FROM MY CHAIN SMOKING FATHER. 

QUITTING SMOKING LEAVES ME WIDE OPEN WITHOUT A BUFFER OR EXPERIENCE TO DEAL WITH THE PAIN OF THE HUMAN CONDITION.

I JUST HAVE TO TRUST THIS TOO SHALL PASS.

SMOG DONE.  I TOOK CARLOS THE LENTILS, ALMONDS AND SANITIZER.  HE TESTED AND EVERYTHING WAS GOOD,  HE TOOK OFF WITH THE CAR TO A SMOG SHOP.  SAID 10 MINUTES BUT AN HOUR LATER I WAS WORRIED.  I LEFT MY PHONE IN THE CAR SO NEXT DOOR WAS NICE ENOUGH TO LET ME CALL.  HE NEEDED TO DRIVE THE CAR 40 MILES TO RESET COMPUTER.  THE OXYGEN SENSOR IS GOOD.  THE COMPUTER NEEDS TO RESET AFTER BEING WIPED.  IT NEEDS TO BE DRIVEN. 

I WENT 11;20 TO SENIOR LUNCH LINE AND THEY HAVE ME PASTA BUT I MISTAKENLY THOUGHT I ORDERED BOCA BURGER.  I WAITED WALKING AROUND BLOCK 'TIL 12;15 TO PICK UP BURGER.  SO I HAD LUNCH AND DINNER.  I TALKED TO TOKI, ART, SYDNEY, WALTER. 

GOT HOME EXHAUSTED, ATE, SIESTA 2 TO 5. 

I'M FEELING WRUNG OUT.