mom did the minimum to keep me alive. i was just part of the house. i wasn't allowed feelings. i was furniture. i have to change me. i have to unlearn and teach myself to love myself. i put everyone ahead of me because that's what they taught me. i didn't matter. i was there only to support them. if and when i shined i was punished, my successes tarnished by their derision, excluded and isolated forced to celebrate alone if at all.
all the stomach pain pelvic survival issues from lack of love. i'm soothing my stomach with grapefruit c's.
cesar 911 i was raised in a puppy mill. my depression, lack of love, feeling used. mom allowed everyone to take advantage of me under the guise of 'toughening me up'. the world is tough enough without my family beating me up. she never took my side backed me up in any every situation..
i can learn new behaviors.
11 am. what do i want to do next. i'm happy who i am. senior center cooling station open 2-8. or 'superman' marathon. 1 pm classic nbc tv game shows. 'jamie' and 'love boat' 6 pm.
7 pm -93 o i'm sweating out toxins and loving it.
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