Tuesday, September 5, 2023

found missing peach in fridge. dad's 24th year

unfortunately no good.  i still have 3 ripening in trunk.  finally ate omelet.  organic egg heavy and tasteless.  stomach iffy.  lots of grape c.  

still debating which library.  playing mahjong board jumping.  so annoying.  i could go tomorrow.

wearing tight jeans reminds me the years of support hose after 1972 fall hurt my spine.  holding me together.  i wore girdle too.  x quit his job no discussion just announced it.  so i had to get extra hours.  more torture besides a loveless marriage.  

9:18 sitting in front of sunny waiting to open.  aha, i can puzzle my own at central.   i drove onto monroe and traffic to costco too intense.  i still have over quarter tank.  

i never used to like sitting or walking.  i never knew i could be comfortable like wearing shoes.  mom only bought me one pair a year so my feet hurt shoes never fitting.  no wonder i hated being alive.  i was in constant pain and suffering.  my mom punished me if i complained so i have a problem with that too.  

i'm watching asian wife hand book from her bag to husband like he's a child can't manage to carry his own book to return on his own.  wow.  me and every relationship.  it's what mom knew too.  and she lamented she couldn't have nice things.  description online of their behavior called quiet cutting-subtle undermining.  they made me feel like nothing.  i had no self-esteem.  none. zero.  zip.  

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